Lemony Snickets?
Yesterday was a pretty good day. The weekend in general was pretty damn good. Until about 10:30 Sunday night. I come upstairs and Rachel asks me to grab a couple of rolls of toilet paper out of the guest bathroom. I grab the tp, put one of the rolls on the dispenser and put two more in the little wooden cabinet above the toilet. I turn the shower on, take out my contacts and walk over to grab my towel and WHAM!!!! I slam my head into the corner of the cabinet door. I guess the little magnet didn't catch when I closed the cabinet door. Man that hurt. Ya know how on cartoons the characters see stars. Well I literally saw stars. So Im walking around cursing, holding my head. Rachel hears the thud, and comes in to see if Im ok. "Are you ok" "What happened" "What's wrong?" she starts bombarding me with questions. At that point I didn't feel much like talking, so I snapped at her "I'll be ok, just go away". When my head cleared I felt terrible for snapping at her. But the combination of the pain, and being slightly disoriented, made my temper flare up.
So I say Im sorry, and get all that squared away. I go back into the bathroom, turn off the shower, grab my book and sit down on the toilet. That all went ok, until I flushed the toilet. The toilet backs up and water spills over onto the floor. So Im running down stairs to get a plunger and the mop. I finally get the clog cleared up and the water mopped up. I take my shower and go to bed. I fall asleep, and about 12:30 my cell phone rings. I answer it, I assume it was the wrong number. They were yelling something at me in a language I didn't understand. After saying "NO!" to them about 20 times, they finally got the hint and hung up.
I put my cell phone down, roll over and fall back to sleep. 1:00AM my cell phone rings again. This time it was someone from work calling. Now Im livid. 1) Im not oncall 2) When they told me what they were calling about, it was so dumb, I couldn't believe they couldn't figure it out on their own.
At that point my blood pressure was sky high, so I went downstairs to calm down a bit. I played a spirited game of Sid Meirs Railroads, and eventually fell asleep on the couch.
Now Im left to wonder...WWBD (what would Borat do). I figured he would blame everything on the Jews. That's a given. So I then asked myself "what would Borat do to make himself feel better?" So in true Borat style, I went to the Hummer dealership. But I couldn't afford a Hummer, so I ended up buying a used iced cream truck. I successfully ran over 5 gypsies on my way into work!!! I feel so much better now!
So I say Im sorry, and get all that squared away. I go back into the bathroom, turn off the shower, grab my book and sit down on the toilet. That all went ok, until I flushed the toilet. The toilet backs up and water spills over onto the floor. So Im running down stairs to get a plunger and the mop. I finally get the clog cleared up and the water mopped up. I take my shower and go to bed. I fall asleep, and about 12:30 my cell phone rings. I answer it, I assume it was the wrong number. They were yelling something at me in a language I didn't understand. After saying "NO!" to them about 20 times, they finally got the hint and hung up.
I put my cell phone down, roll over and fall back to sleep. 1:00AM my cell phone rings again. This time it was someone from work calling. Now Im livid. 1) Im not oncall 2) When they told me what they were calling about, it was so dumb, I couldn't believe they couldn't figure it out on their own.
At that point my blood pressure was sky high, so I went downstairs to calm down a bit. I played a spirited game of Sid Meirs Railroads, and eventually fell asleep on the couch.
Now Im left to wonder...WWBD (what would Borat do). I figured he would blame everything on the Jews. That's a given. So I then asked myself "what would Borat do to make himself feel better?" So in true Borat style, I went to the Hummer dealership. But I couldn't afford a Hummer, so I ended up buying a used iced cream truck. I successfully ran over 5 gypsies on my way into work!!! I feel so much better now!


3 Comments:
Ouch. Do you have a bump? I would unfortunetly react the same way. One time I was walking in our apt to use the bathroom. We have slippery floors. Niel blames my incessent cleaning. Like Danny Tanner. Anyway I fell and as I fell I banged my head on the wall. I also smack the door closed with my leg as I fell and I hear Niel running to see if I am ok. I am embarresed and I won't open the door and want to be left alone. At least the rest of your weekend was good and it was only Sunday night with your bad luck.
yeah I have a bit of a bump and a small cut. Hehe Niel may be right about the cleaning. I've slid a few times walking across your living room when I have socks on. hehe.
I swear the floor is like that. When moved in before the wedding my cousins were sliding across the floor too and I didn't even get a chance to clean. The house is possesed!
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