I was reading this article last night and it discussed popular phrases from the 20th century. Most of them I've already forgotten, but there is one particularly great one that Im going to start working into my everyday vocabulary.

Supposidly back in the 1920's when someone was at the top of their game, or better at something than everyone else (sort of like being cream of the crop) a popular expression to describe this would be to say "Boy that Johnny is something else, he's the dean's peanuts!"
Deans peanuts!? I don't know why I find that so funny, but I do. Maybe it's the whole peanuts sounding like penis thing.

I encourage all readers of this posting to work this phrase into your every day life. I used to think saying the cats pajamas was silly, but this one takes the cake! I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and no matter what adventure you embark upon this weekend, may you be the dean's peanuts!

So the doctor tells me the lump in my neck is a sebaceous syst. I'm on antibiotics and that should take care of it. if the anti biotics don't help, the doctor can inject cortizone. I'm hoping it doesn't come to that. I HATE NEEDLES!

I wrote this poem while I was on the can...


I love the fall
I'm having a ball
Woncha give me a call
Jewish guys are named Saul
Give Keshawn the damn ball
I'm not very tall
I miss Yankee outfielders named Paul
People from the south speak with a drawl
When it's icy outside, old people fall
I like shopping at the mall
Im boncing off the wall

So Saturday, was the big Sully’s golf tournament at Bristow Manor. Luckily the stormy weather had moved out on Friday, and Saturday turned out to be a beautiful day, quite warm, but nice and sunny. Wound up getting sun burn on the back of my neck. We showed up and quickly discovered that we were the only sober group in the whole tournament. We enjoy the food at Sully’s, seems like the rest of the folks playing in the tournament seemed to enjoy the bar. We loaded up our bags into the carts and waited to hear from the starter. We didn’t have enough groups for a shot got start, so we all started on hole #1. We were the 5th group out.

To make a long story short, we finished 5th out of 11 groups overall, we finished 4 shots over par. We could have done a lot better, but our putting was terrible. We couldn’t sink a putt to save our lives. I won $40 on hole #3 for winning the closest to the pin contest. I hit a 7 iron about 3 feet from the 165 yard hole. BOOYAH!! We had 6 groups behind us, so wasn’t sure it was going to hold up, but it did. Mr. Weber came close to winning the closest to the hole on #11. But someone towards the end beat him out. It was nice winning some money for a change. Hmmm does this mean I am now technically a “professional golfer” since I earned money? Hmmm probably not ;-).

After the 18th hole, all the groups who finished sat on the cart path behind the 18th green to watch the groups behind them finish up. Things got downright ugly. At that point, there were several people who had drank so much beer, they could barely stand. At one point the heckling got so bad, that one of the guys putting on the green, dropped his pants and mooned the hecklers. The 2nd to last group was a group of 4 girls that comprised of a waitress from Sully’s, the Sulivans daughter (who was best friends with Rachel during HS), and two other women who I believe are bartenders. The drunken fools didn’t let up, they continued to heckle and yell lude comments at the women. At one point one of the guys yelled “hey ladies, do you wanna wacky my noodle!” (he was playing a Maxfli Noodle golf ball). The last group was all dressed in green, and wearing weird plastic green hats. The kind of hats you see people wear on St. Patricks day.

Once the last group was finished, we headed into the bar at the clubhouse where each of us was given a complimentary drink. I had a Killians Irish Red. The guy Domingo who organized the whole tournament announced the winners of the closest to the pin, long drive and best team score. It’s funny, Domingo sort of reminded me of Romeo from Tin Cup, except that Domingo was dressed like Strawberry Shortcake. He was wearing a pink shirt and purple shorts. Oh and he was using a hot pink tee.

I go to the doctor tomorrow to find out what that mysterious pea sized lump is in my neck. At first I thought it was an ingrown hair, but it hasn’t gone away in over 3 weeks, so probably best to get it checked out by a doctor. Im sure its nothing, but better to be safe.

On Sunday, Rachel and I went out to Manassas to walk around the old Civil War Battle fields. It was kind of neat, but also kind of creepy. There were several signs in the grass that read “Colonial James Henry of the NY infantry was killed here on July 5th, 1845. Kind of weird to be walking on a field where hundreds of men died in battle. The field still has several Civil War cannons and wagons scattered about, and some old farm houses are still around. They claim that some of the trails are haunted. Most of the trails were closed this weekend because of the flooding related to Hurricane Isabel, but many joggers have reported seeing confederate soldiers behind trees and walking the fields.

We lucked out with Hurricane Isabel. Other than losing our power for about 24 hours (11PM Thursday night, till 10PM Friday night), we didn’t have any damage. A few of our neighbors had siding blown off and lost some shingles off their roof. Several trees all around the area lost large limbs, and some others were uprooted completely. It was especially bad in some of the wooded areas. One tree fell which caused a sort of domino effect. The best part was that I got to leave work early on Thursday and got the day off on Friday. WOOHOO :-)!

Holy crap, Johnny Cash and John Ritter died. Plus Warren Zevon earlier in the week. I guess they really do happen in 3's. Apparantly, John Ritter died from some disorder of his heart and aorta. Where his aorta tore away from his heart. OUCH! Feel kind of bad now because he was recently hosting some show we were watching and Rachel and I commented about how terrible he looked and how old looking he got.

Wouldn't you know it, this whole week it's been warm and sunny during the day and cool and crisp at night. Now that the weekend is almost upon us, it's overcast, windy and cool. Yesterday it was 86 degrees and sunny, and I'm trapped in an office for 9 hours. The weekend is here when I can actually bask in the sunlight, play some golf, do some yard work and the weather turns crappy. Well at least it's football season and I can just veg out on the couch if the weather turns real bad.

Next Staurday is the big Sully's Golf Tournament at Bristow Manor. A restaurant we frequent, which is owned by the parents of Rachel's best friend in high school is sponsoring a best ball tournament. So me, Mike, Rachel's dad and brother Jonathan will make up a foresome that will hopefully do some damage. The winner of the tournament gets dinner for 4 at Sully's. On the par 3's closest to the pin wins $25 and there are two long drive holes at $50 a piece. Not bad. If we tee off from the white tees, I should have a fairly good chance at the closest to the pin. I can hit a decently long ball, but I just don't have the size to compete in the long drive. My max is about 270 yards, but my average is only around 220-235.

This is gonna sound silly, but we got this new sheet set and comforter for the wedding. We just got around to getting it out and putting it on the bed. These sheets are by far the softest most comfortably sheets I've ever slept on. It's like sleeping on a lamb! 300 thread count sheets rule.

So glad football season is here. With the Yankees struggeling to stay afloat, I needed a diversion from baseball, and what could be a better diversion than football? Im happy to report that I won in my fantasy football league this week. I won 79-59 despite piss poor performances by Corey Dillon and Marvin Harrison. Hopefully the kick things up a notch in week 2.

Saw a strange incident last night. Rachel and I were out to dinner at a near by Mexican(t) restaurant and once a week they have kids night. I'm guessing that this past week; kids night was on Monday because there were several helium baloons stuck up on the ceiling. The ceiling was an open ceiling that was about 15-18 feet up. About half way through our dinner, the hostest who seated us began looking up at all the baloons. A few minutes later, she came out with a helium balooon of her own with a good deal of riibbon on the bottom and what appeared to be double sided tape on the top of the baloon. She stood under the balloon and released it towards the ceiling. After about 2-3 minutes of moving the baloon around, a manager came out and gave her some pointers. At this point, several people in the restaurant, myself included were sitting with mouths agape watching this girl try to "fish" for baloons. Well I guess whatever her manager told her did the trick because shortly after their talk she actually successfully hooked a baloon from the ceiling with her "sticky" baloon. When she did this, I had the sudden urge to give her a round of applause. She moved on and removed several other baloons. I was very impressed.

We were out tonight and Rachel's phone beeped like she had received a text or voice message. She looked at her phone and it was a strange text message that read something like "I'm getting married on Sunday, and you're invited. It will be a small wedding, no need to bring a gift, just bring someone for me to marry". It came from a strange numbered address. And the weirdest part about it was that the message showed up as coming in at around 4:00 AM on Sept 11, which wasn't for another 8 hours or so. Plus it didn't come in as the newest message in her inbox, it came in as like the 4th message in her inbox. Just thought it was odd.

Got an invite to take an intermediate photography class through Nikon. I feel like I can use some work in the area of composition so I'm seriously considering taking it. I know the basics about apertures, ISO, shutter speed, white balance etc., so I think it's time to take things to the next level. I'll often see something outside or around the house and I'll grab my camera and take a few shots from different angles. Then when I look at them, they often times don't come out quite the way I envisoned them. When I look through magazines I see so many ads and photos shot from all kinds of creative angles, that are just very visually interesting. I look at my photos and I have a few unique and interesting ones, but the majority are just sort of plain and ordinary.

Only problem with the class is that I think you need a digital SLR camera and external flash unit. I have neither, so it may be time for an upgrade :-). Or perhaps they will let you use a loaner camera and flash for the classes. I'll have to call up and find out.

So glad football season is here. With the Yankees struggeling to stay afloat, I needed a diversion from baseball, and what could be a better diversion than football? Im happy to report that I won in my fantasy football league this week. I won 79-59 despite piss poor performances by Corey Dillon and Marvin Harrison. Hopefully the kick things up a notch in week 2.

Saw a strange incident last night. Rachel and I were out to dinner at a near by Mexican(t) restaurant and once a week they have kids night. I'm guessing that this past week; kids night was on Monday because there were several helium baloons stuck up on the ceiling. The ceiling was an open ceiling that was about 15-18 feet up. About half way through our dinner, the hostest who seated us began looking up at all the baloons. A few minutes later, she came out with a helium balooon of her own with a good deal of riibbon on the bottom and what appeared to be double sided tape on the top of the baloon. She stood under the balloon and released it towards the ceiling. After about 2-3 minutes of moving the baloon around, a manager came out and gave her some pointers. At this point, several people in the restaurant, myself included were sitting with mouths agape watching this girl try to "fish" for baloons. Well I guess whatever her manager told her did the trick because shortly after their talk she actually successfully hooked a baloon from the ceiling with her "sticky" baloon. When she did this, I had the sudden urge to give her a round of applause. She moved on and removed several other baloons. I was very impressed.

We were out tonight and Rachel's phone beeped like she had received a text or voice message. She looked at her phone and it was a strange text message that read something like "I'm getting married on Sunday, and you're invited. It will be a small wedding, no need to bring a gift, just bring someone for me to marry". It came from a strange numbered address. And the weirdest part about it was that the message showed up as coming in at around 4:00 AM on Sept 11, which wasn't for another 8 hours or so. Plus it didn't come in as the newest message in her inbox, it came in as like the 4th message in her inbox. Just thought it was odd.

Got an invite to take an intermediate photography class through Nikon. I feel like I can use some work in the area of composition so I'm seriously considering taking it. I know the basics about apertures, ISO, shutter speed, white balance etc., so I think it's time to take things to the next level. I'll often see something outside or around the house and I'll grab my camera and take a few shots from different angles. Then when I look at them, they often times don't come out quite the way I envisoned them. When I look through magazines I see so many ads and photos shot from all kinds of creative angles, that are just very visually interesting. I look at my photos and I have a few unique and interesting ones, but the majority are just sort of plain and ordinary.

Only problem with the class is that I think you need a digital SLR camera and external flash unit. I have neither, so it may be time for an upgrade :-). Or perhaps they will let you use a loaner camera and flash for the classes. I'll have to call up and find out.

The VMA's. I didn't watch the whole thing, but I did see quite a few clips and here is what I gathered...

1) It's not cool to be white... Ok, Britey Spears, Justin Timberlake and Fred Durst, I have news for you. You're all white! You are three of the whitest people on the planet. I can see why Eminem talks the way he does, because he's trying to fit in with the whole hip hop culture. But Britney Spears is a "pop diva", Fred Durst is in a rock band andd Justin Timberlake was formelly in a boy band. And if you've ever seen Justin on Punk'd, while he was getting scammed he spoke normally, he spoke clearly. As soon at they said he was being Punk'd he flips a switch in his brain and starts calling everyone dawg, and saying "yo maaan". It's sad when the whitest person at the VMA's is Queen Latifah.

2) Britney making out with Madonna is hot. The only thing that could have been hotter is if Britney kissed the Olson twins. Madonna is like 50 years old and the mother of 2. Nuff said...

Rachel and I were watching this snow on MTV called Newlyweds. It's a reality show that places cameras in the home of newly married Jessica Simpson and her pretty boy husband. I encourage everyone to watch the show at least once to see what a whiney, annoying, spoiled brat Jessica Simpson is. By the end of the show I wanted to reach through the telivision screen and strangle her. At one point her husband said to his brother "It's days like this when I'm glad I don't have a gun, or I would shoot myself." His brother turned to him and said "Why you gonna shoot yourself"? I think you get the point :-).

Holy crap, it's September! Maybe it's because this past winter was so cold and snowy, but this summer seems to have flown by. It seems like only yesterday that Rachel and I were down by the lake near Cannon's Stadium on teh 4th of July. Waiting for the fireworks to start as mosquitos ate us alive and little Hispanic children screamed NON STOP for 2 hours. And he we are in September. Geesh!

So this past Sunday, our neighbors down the street mention that they have a farm house about 90 minutes south west of where we live. They needed some help cleaning up the barn. Since I got tons of experience with barns growing up in Queens, I said sure why the hell not.

So we drive down and finally reach the "country". We walk up over the barn, which is padlocked shut and held shut with two large 2 X4 's. When the padlocks were open and the doors were opened, the smell inside the barn was absolutely gross. A mixture of hay, sweat, urine and animal dung hung heavily in the air. Once the barn was opened for a while, the smell disapaited quite a bit.

So there I am, throwing hay around with a pitch fork, removing old piles of wood and scooping up crusty old poop and carting stuff around in a wheel barrow. YEEEEE HAWWWW. At one point our neighbors made reference to some tools that were stored up in the hay loft. Since they are quite a bit older than I am, I volunteered to get the tools for them. I climbed up the ladder and made my way to the top. As I got to the top, I saw something move from the corner of my eye and heard some rusteling in the corner. I look in the direction the noise came from and saw two beety little eyes peering back at me. I took off one of my work gloves (have to keep my hands silky smooth) and tossed it over towards the set of eyes in the corner. Shortly thereafter a fat racoon comes running out towards me, jumps off the loft, falls about 10-12 feet and continues to run out of the barn. It's a good thing the barn was already littered with dung, so when I shit myself it all belnded in.

So the moral of this story kids... Guys from Queens and barns DO NOT MIX!!!!

Coming up later... My comments on the VMA's and Jessica Simpson's new reality show.